Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Gus's hangover

These two, surprisingly enough, have nothing to do with each other. They are just two things that need to be discussed, like my dreams the second I wake up, or politics, or what your "Safe Word" is gonna be. Read on:

Donia was having a homemade raspberry iced tea. She "joked" and asked me to put vodka in it. I, of course, oblige when someone requests booze. She is sipping away and forgets that she is drinking alcohol, mind you, when little Gussy comes crawling up and wants to sip mommy's drink. She allows this, as she has this thing with the dogs where she lets them LICK HER FOOD AND DRINKS with their dirty (or so Ive heard, clean) mouths. Popsicles, ice cream, beer...etc, etc.
So Gussy has a few sips, and wouldnt you know it...wow! Look at that! Gus has puked! At this time I am not aware of the sippy-sippy these two just played. I clean the vomit and we proceed with the day. When we return home hours later, there are vomit piles all over...3 or 4 to be exact. I start wondering what could be wrong with poor Gus, when it dawns on Donia, "Mother of the Year", that she let him sip her drink cuz, "they always sip the beer".
Number 1, to all 4 of you readers out there: we do not let the dogs drink. It's not something we practice. Nash has been sober way too long (3 years this November) to mess it up now, and Gus is only 14 in dog years. The legal drinking age in America, human or otherwise, is still 21. In bars, restaurants, and in our home.
Number 2: she is not a bad mother, and this is no sort of foreshadowing for the children we may have. They will not drink. Vodka. Rum, on the other hand, is less caloric and easier to mix with sodas that wont clog a baby bottle like juice will...
I am perturbed at her for this little snafu, yet I forgive her. The boys lick the condensation off our glasses all the time, and sometimes theres a drop of beer ingested here or there. No big deal, right? Wrong---vodka kills! And vodka makes chihuahuas throw up on your rug or bed or couch or anywhere comfy and cozy thats hard to clean. Trust me, I know.
So now we are stuck with a hungover dog on Saturday. He was mopy and tired and whining about wanting fried foods just like I do after a hangover. He is absolutely fine now, after chanting, "Im never drinking again" over and over.

Havent we all...