Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Sometimes you read things and feel sad for humankind; you are frightened for them, really.

Sometimes you read things and feel sad for humankind; you are frightened for them, really.

There was a blog about the violence inflicted on gay people and the rise of it as more people speak out against discrimination and gay rights. Blah blah blah I didn't even read the blog, but was linked somehow to the comments underneath. I went on to read Denise's comments and was floored.

I have been fortunate enough to have been raised in the most wonderful, normal, and loving family. To this day they drive me to be the best person I can. One thing that I am eternally grateful for is the strength that they have given me. Man bashing aside, though it is a fun past time of ours to blame men for the stupidities in the world (hahhaha right mom. oh , yeah, sorry guys...) my family has very strong women. Not to discount the men, but the women, in numbers, and attitudes, dominate. I know no other way than to be strong, but it does not come naturally. We have all learned this strength and fight throughout the years, as we continue to learn still.

I wanna thank those women I've looked up to for standing up and speaking up. For never giving up. For knowing that when the worst was the worst, it really wasn't, and that they have the power to change it. My response to this poor unfortunate woman is the last one. And no matter what your religious, political, or specifically gay rights views, you can agree that her comments are unnecessary and hateful.


I found that to be a wake up call. We are always saying that things are changing and as far as I'm concerned, it's not really changing. It's just more taboo for them to bash us in public but I know it's still going on in churches and in homes. You have to wonder what your own family might be saying about you when you walk out of the door.

by I Have a Thought on December 18th, 2008 at 11:15 am

There's a whole lot wrong with that. The number one thing being you're equating apples and oranges. Sexual deviates are not discriminated against because of some learned prejudice. The reason they are not accepted is because heterosexuals, all to some degree, see the actual physical things homosexuals do with revulsion. As a heterosexual, I promise you that if I imagine myself involved in a homosexual tryst too vividly, I become nauseated. It's not bigotry or senseless hatred you're struggling against, it's nausea. And no one wants to be nauseated. People naturally avoid sources of nausea. When people inescapably have sources of nausea shoved in their faces, they naturally rebel in some way. You mistakenly refer to this rebellion as "anti-gay" violence. You're way wrong with that.

Where the problems come is when people are openly confronted with sources of nausea. A few decades back, when you all were in the "closet", anti-homosexual violence was more rare. That is because there were fewer sources of nausea. If you'll dress and act like the mainstream population out in public and keep what you do in your bedroom, you'll have much fewer problems. If you go out in public rubbing it in people's faces, fairly soon you'll get the shit knocked out of you by someone you're making genuinely physically sick. Simple as that. It's a damn shame you can't understand that and waste so much of your resources and time laboring for the impossible under a futile delusion. Just drop all this rights thing and enjoy your lives in private. Damn, don't you know what a pogrom is? No sense trying to get yourselves nominated as number one candidate for the next one that comes along. Read a little relevant history, keep your heads low, and survive.

by Denise Stafford on December 21st, 2008 at 4:53 pm

Denise… it's hate like you have displayed in your comment that has this country falling apart. But the greatest thing about a comment like yours is that it reminds people like me to keep my head held higher, challenge history, and live a far greater life than just simply surviving.

by goldstardyke on December 21st, 2008 at 5:09 pm

Goldstar, I don't hate you or anyone else. I honestly wish you and all your kind the best. But you should agree nature dictates you'll always be in a minority. Period. The essay I responded to pointed out the correlation between heightened homosexual activism and increased violence toward that group. I promise you I haven't contributed to the numbers. Homosexuality is an unfortunate genetic condition to which normal people are hard wired to respond with revulsion despite what drums the freaks in Hollywood beat. You're not going to change human nature. The more hell you raise, the more harm you're going to bring your kind. Just look at results of recent ballot proposals. Quit while you're ahead and be happy before you bring genuine grievances upon yourselves.

by name Denise Stafford on December 21st, 2008 at 7:04 pm

Denise, I won't go back and forth on the issues. I see things my way and you yours. I wish the world could find a happy medium, but I fear it my never happen. If homosexuals make you want to vomit please move on to another blog.

by goldstardyke on December 21st, 2008 at 7:57 pm

Denise, I really hope you are a teenager, like myself.

I can tolerate fellow teenagers saying things like that.. because sadly, many 16 year olds are close minded and ignorant of many things.

However I find it truly disappointing and honestly it makes me quite sad to hear adults speak like that. It is disrespectful and unbelievably ignorant. It's quite obvious that this is a website geared towards homosexuals.. so if your views are blatantly against homosexuality, what exactly do you hope to gain from saying such things? I highly doubt any of the authors or writers here (or many other people, for that matter) would agree with your opinion that all heterosexuals "become nauseated" by gays and lesbians.

"The reason they are not accepted is because heterosexuals, all to some degree, see the actual physical things homosexuals do with revulsion." This is a direct quote from what you said, and it is extremely false. You, personally, might become nauseated by "the actual physical things homosexuals do" and that is perfectly fine, however I can guarantee you that not ALL heterosexuals feel this way, mainly because I have many heterosexual friends that are perfectly ok with homosexuality. No one is forcing you to be accepting of certain views, as it is obviously not possible.

However, if you wish to call yourself a respectable adult, I would have hoped that you would have enough maturity to be capable of respecting other people's views, opinions, and beliefs. Do you see me verbally abusing you and telling you that what you do with individuals you are attracted to disgusts me? Do I tell you that you are nauseating? No. So please, especially around the holidays, do us all a favor and pull together enough maturity to grow up.

Em..s last blog post..aaah! src=""

by Em on December 21st, 2008 at 8:24 pm

Dear Em and Goldstar,

I'll take one last shot at explaining myself. My response wasn't directed at you two. Probably nothing can be said which could change the minds of such firebrand activists. But not all homosexual females march, riot, curse for the TV cameras, and show the uglier side of themselves to the public in the name of overreaching "rights". Once again I was pointing out the relation between increased lesbian activism and violence against lesbians.

This violence doesn't single out the activists who are stirring the pot of disgust. The victims of the backlash are generally just everyday innocent females, some lesbians, some like myself who are not, who have the misfortune to encounter those you've enraged. These are the women I am trying to persuade to take a second look at your organized activism and the single thing it's undeniably accomplishing for us; increased incidences of assault. I am simply asking readers to consider facts and reconsider supporting these futile and dangerous activist movements.

One fact is throughout the animal kingdom aggression and competition defines male sexual behavior. It is a deadly serious area of natural behavior. The sexual identity of heterosexual males is ultimately the most important aspect of their existence. Threatening or compromising this identity is the single cause of violence against lesbians by male heterosexuals.

All women should realize this fact without the physical trauma of experience; having our teeth knocked down our throats or our little female bones snapped like twigs by enraging the much superior physical power of the human heterosexual male who, by God's design, will continue to dominate our species. It's just common sense. Dress and act like a normal female in public and you'll greatly increase the chances you'll be treated like one

by name Denise Stafford on December 23rd, 2008 at 9:55 am

Hahahahahahahaha an activist? Honey I'm a 16 year old in high school. I can assure you I wear make up and I dress like a "normal" female, tight jeans, chucks, fitted tops from AE and abercombie… I'm not an enraged dangerous lesbian activist and I find it hysterical that you refer to me as such.

So… Denise I think you should just stop. Really. I dress like a normal female in public, and I get treated like one too. I promise. It's just people like you that make a big stink over things.

Oh, and I'm pretty sure heterosexual males everywhere are cringing over the fact that you made them all sound extremely shallow by saying "The sexual identity of heterosexual males is ultimately the most important aspect of their existence."


Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, Oh my God.
I'm nauseated by the comments made by Denise. I am in awe, sitting here at my computer. 1, what is your agenda on a lesbian site posting such hate? ANd I'm sorry, but claim as much as you want that it's not hate, but nothing will ever convince me of that. What is it that draws you to this site? What is it in you that makes you think speaking this way is ok? That is does anything positive for yourself, or us, or the universe, or "your cause"? Why do you seek out those things you don't agree with, people that you only have ill thoughts and feelings towards, and bash them? That is my only question.
Who told you it was a good idea to put your head down and keep quiet? If that were the answer, more than half the people in this country would have their heads down. And I don't mean half are lesbians. Black people would still be slaves. They wouldn't vote, or marry, or have been desegregated. Women would still be quietly coasting through opressed existences and marriages and be barefoot and pregnant, uneducated, unemployed, and silenced in all areas of their lives. This country would be all white instead of the wonderful and culturally-diverse union it is. Obama, Hillary…we would have never seen their faces on TV. Is that the answer for you in your life? Fear the man and take what's coming to you, or worse, just take what you can get? Do you have no fight in you, no drive, no pride? I am not trying to get catty with you at all, I will not resort to name calling or insults, though the "animal" in me would love to settle this the good ole fashioned "animal kingdom" way you speak of. And do you know why I'd win that fight, Denise? Because you are afraid of what you don't know. Can you win, should you try? Are they going to hurt you, cast you out? You don't know. Instead of fighting for yourself, you let others decide what will happen to you. You put your head down and act like they want you to, not as you really feel in your heart. (If you're about to rebut by saying you are acting on what's in your heart by making these arguments, don't even try it. It is not out of love that you speak these words.)
I don't need to run the streets screaming that I'm in love with a female for the ooh's and aah's. But I certainly will never deny it, not for you, not for me, and not for those wishing that I, we ALL, would just sit down and shut up. They wished that with African Americans, and women, and countless other "minority" groups, but they didn't do anything of the sort. And thank God (yes, my GOd is the same God as yours) they didn't. Think of where we, and that includes you, would be.
My only hope for you is love and acceptance, and to actually understand what those words mean. I wish for you compassion and peace in your heart. When you find it, you'll look back and see the error of your ways. You'll see the life you were living and you'll be so glad to finally understand what it is to love and be loved.
Positive karma.

(If this interests you, or sickens you, and you need to read more wonderful rebuttals, go to:

Thursday, December 18, 2008

QRSTVW is for Quite Right, Sorry TV Weatherman

And the U that was left out stands for Ugggghhhhhhh! How could I live in Seattle the winter that is happens to be THE COLDEST SINCE 1990! I didnt sign up for this! I signed up for fog and rain and Starbucks and the city. If I wanted this, I'd be home! Ok, ok, so I didn't leave home for better weather, it was actually some pesky (and I guess cute) girl. And boy does she owe me BIG TIME for this! Not only is it a storm here, too, now, but they are no good at maintaining it! I had to bundle up and walk to work today (pics coming soon...I know, I know, I always say that) and it was pretty cool to see no city traffic or people shoving their way by you. Everyone was in the same boat because everyone looked foolish, as did I. Bundled head to toe in hats and scarves and mittens and puffy coats with rain/snow boots to top it all off. And those who thought they had to look chic and tough it out for fashion's sake just felt foolish. They passed us with what at first looked like pity, but if you looked closer it was actually freezing envy.

Thank God there was a holiday gathering at the office yesterday. I came in to cookies and fruit and pot pie for lunch. Everyone is snowed in, I have no appts because I cant get anywhere and no one can get to me, and theres only 2 of us here today. (Hi JEnna, I know youre are the boys this time?! Speaking of our boys, NAsh was a MESS during the thunderstorm! Donia was up getting ready and after he ate and heard the 2 big booms, he was on the end of the bed, frozen, shaking like Ive never felt him shake. He wouldnt come to lay with me, wouldnt move at all, for fear that any sudden movement, even his own, would cause that terrible sound again, that was for sure going to get him. Cant wait for a child's reaction. When I asked Donia, "Oh my God, was that thunder!?" She answered, "Nah I think it was just a snow plow. By the second clap, she opened the door and whispered in, "Whao! That was THUNDER!" Such a smart, smart girl. Ok, bye.)

So remind me to tell you guys some time about the story I told my boss about how Nash hates thunder...

8 days until I leave for home, and let me tell you, I’m already there. I’ve been working hard to get all of my final assignments done at the office so that I can go have a relaxing 17 days off (and so my coworkers can have 17 relaxing days without my clients!), and now I’m at the point where it’s just a waiting game. This would be excruciating if I hadn’t just gone home a month ago, but still, the excitement is building every day. And it’s funny because Christmas actually happens before I leave, but I keep forgetting about it. Donia would be mad at me for saying that, and it’s not like we’re not gonna have a good Christmas together. It’s just that sometimes you’re used to Christmas feeling a certain way, and it’ll be the first time in 2 years I’ve seen my fam at the holidays. It’s just going to be great! Donia and I will have a wonderful dinner (prepared by her, mostly, with my help on simple things like stirring, and…um…stirring.) Then we have special gifts and STOCKINGS (her fav) to open up Christmas morning. I actually have to work the day after Christmas, but as I do she will do some last minute prep before we go home, and drop the dogs off at the kennel. Pray pray pray for no snow next week!

When we finally get home we have all sorts of fun things planned like Christmas parties with our families, my 10 year high school reunion, a trip to VT for a night, a birthday party for my sis, a rehearsal dinner, and of course a WEDDING!

Let me just tell you that I’m so excited for my little bro and his lovely bride-to-be. I love their relationship, I love the dynamic of those 2 together, and I love the fact that they’re getting married. I couldn’t be prouder of him as a person and as a man and as a future husband to Kristen. I’ve really only wanted what was best for him from day one. I guess we’ve never been the closest and most affectionate siblings. We went separate ways for a few years there when I was at school and he was working, but every time I see him we are back to where we left off, and I see more and more things we have in common. I guess it only comes with age to really appreciate your siblings. Or its that I live so far away and I see that I took for granted living so close to them before and not hanging out more. I’ve been at points where I’ve wanted to shake each and every one of my siblings about something or another that I thought they should be doing differently or selling themselves short on. I am certain they have felt the same with me. In the end, though, you can’t make someone do something, no matter what reasoning you use (just ask our parents!) As I age, I know I’ll just get closer to them. J

Wow, where did that come from? This snow really brings out the crazy in some people! Sorry to share too much so early. If anyone was uncomfortable with my pouring of emotions, just message me and I can say something rude, witty, or just plain mean to erase it and return to normalcy.

(JK I love my fam/emotions/weepiness)

Ok I gg navigate how I’m gonna get home. I’ve got a lotta hills to climb!!!!!!